I am a brilliant person because I know absolutely nothing. May 29, 2011

Where I live, it is easy to feel like there are restrictions upon us such as school, work, homework, music practice, or sports teams. But what if I simply didn’t do all those things? What if I simply didn’t participate in my life for one day? Well, life would go on. Time doesn’t wait for me, so I choose to keep up with time. After all, there is a reason I do the things I do. I want to be educated, do well in school, see my friends, have money, have job experience, work with people, be active, have fun, learn music… these things all matter a lot to me.

 

I have control over my life and therefore the power to be who I want to be and to make my life awesome. This realization fills me with life until all I can see when I look around is that life is everywhere. There are so many things to discover about the world and no matter how hard I try, I’ll never even come close to understanding all of it. Yet, I can still choose to learn about it and discover and discuss because that’s human. Ultimately though, I recognize that I know nothing. Absolutely nothing.

 

Knowing nothing is reality. Knowing that I know nothing is a reward. My cup is both half full and half empty, but in anticipation to be filled.

Finding Emptiness in a Overflowing Mind

There are three possible situations for when I write:

1. I have to write- school assignment, application etc.
2. I am overflowing- there is too much filling my head and I need to get some of it down on paper before I implode. Until then, I’m unable to get anything else accomplished.
3. My ideal state for writing: emptiness. Organized desk, homework done, house clean, laundry put away, practice done, family settled, clear sunny day (preferably), no time limit. I have the space and time to reach into my mind and pull out the ideas and the stories that have been brewing there.

 

In the last six months or so I’ve written a bit, mostly in state 1 and sometimes state 2, but I never quite get to state 3. I really want to get there, yet in wanting perfection, I’ve delayed a lot of writing. Now, I’m starting to feel the ideas pile up in my head and I want to get it out written words, share it with people, and let it be.

 

Yet there must have been something that stopped me before from writing, some sort of restrictions or worries. How do I want to write? I want to write without worrying about the piece being “finished” or “edited” or “enough.” I want to write about what I want to write about. I want to write and make people think, therefore creating discussion. I want to write by sitting down and letting the words find their place on the page without having to go back and struggle to rearrange them. I want to write and by doing so, get better, smoother, faster at writing.

 

So, dear readers, fellow frozen tic-tac-ers, people of the blogging world, I’m going to start here. I’m going to go back into my old documents and find the things I started (in the past six months or so) but never quite finished, and finish them. I’m going to carry a small notebook with me and jot down random trains of thinking or intriguing conversation. I’m going to see if I can generate more writing on this blog, both in posts and replies.

 

After all, that’s what blogging is about to me. Having stories and ideas, writing them, and having a place to share them. I mean, if something matters enough to me that I even want to write about it, I think it should be written and have a place to be seen. So here it goes 🙂